I love love love love living by myself.

the thing is my inability-to-do-stuff is WAY more under control when I’m alone, because so much of my shutting-down comes from stupid sources of anxiety like “a person might judge my food choices” or “a person might hear me existing” or “I may have to do 5 seconds of social pleasantries with a roommate/parent/etc.”

most of my “getting-stuck” starts from a place of anxiety where I kind of just close in around myself and try to stop being a person. (“nope I’m not hungry/don’t have to go to the bathroom/need to go to the store/to an appointment,  because that would involve alerting the outside world to the fact that I exist.”)

(I can avoid it at work if I pour coffee into my brain and have headphones in constantly. I forgot headphones today and didn’t accomplish shit.)

braiiins.

f0x:

f0xpaw:

☆*・゜゚・*\ F0XPAW GIVEAWAY /*・゜゚・*☆

i’m having my first giveaway for my etsy shop, thef0xpaw!

if you win this giveaway, you will receive these things, many of which have not even yet been released in-shop (!!!)

  • one signed rainbow cat skull screenprint
  • one illuminate linocut print
  • one elixir shirt of your size
  • one wire-wrapped animal tooth pendant
  • one tangerine aura quartz pendant
  • one geode slice necklace on pink hemp cord
  • one large blue canvas screenprinted patch
  • $20.00 store credit to f0xpaw
  • two lil’ bonus boxes of lovely incense

the rules are simple — follow this blog (f0xpaw.tumblr.com) and reblog this post! only one reblog per person, please! reblogs by giveaway/prize blogs will be invalid; international entries welcome.

winner will be chosen at random and announced/contacted on MAY 5TH! good luck!

i’m doing a giveaway you guys! :)) good luck! spread the love!

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today I think I’ve officially hit the crash made inevitable by the last month or so of living on adrenaline and caffeine and not sleeping.

nearly fell asleep on my desk at work and now have to go buy food but don’t wanna.

guy from chicago commented on my facebook comic con post to say it’s too bad I couldn’t go to a chicago con with him.

idk. no idea if I’ll ever see him again but it’s just kinda nice to know that more than one person exists who has seen me in *that* way without doing something awful or making me hate myself.

all the shit I did last week happened in a whirlwind without actual thoughts or feelings and then I actually slept last night and don’t have anywhere to be, and I’m suddenly confused because wait, I live here now?

like my whole brain is just ????????

also I think the new meds have just shut off my ability to experience the sensation of being tired, but I should probably just lie down and wait for sleep to happen, because this is probably super unhealthy, (I slept for like an hour last night and the night before that only 4. but I feel nothing. it’s creepy.)

the highlight of the day was probably meeting Edward James Olmos or maybe the 800+ person Dr Horrible sing-along screening where we all knew all the words.

I have actually never enjoyed a con this much; it was a good day.

huzzah.

huzzah.

> why the shit am I not tired or brainfoggy at all when I’ve gotten no sleep and should be dying.
> oh right I started back on meds today.

made some pokeball earrings for my twitch plays pokemon cosplay. (I haven’t used sculpey clay in years!)

made some pokeball earrings for my twitch plays pokemon cosplay. (I haven’t used sculpey clay in years!)

I am fucking baking sculpey cosplay jewlery.

living alone turns me into some kind of geek-domesticity-expert.

also these hair extensions look super legit which is creeping me out since I haven’t had long hair in five years.

the fanon since red has been INTENSE PROTAGONIST INSOMNIA so my sleep deprivation will be part of my costume.

wip A cosplay for tomorrow.

wip A cosplay for tomorrow.